Over the last several weeks the sensation of presque vu has enveloped me. In case you weren't aware, presque vu is the feeling of being on the edge of a great breakthrough or epiphany. The frustration, of course, lies in the anticipation, which could actually precede a complete lack of said breakthrough. I suspect that's going to be the case now.
Presque vu was a pretty common feeling for me when I was younger. In those days, a phenomenal breakthrough was possible in numerous realms of my life — the world being my proverbial oyster and everything — so it wasn't a bad feeling necessarily. It's not "bad" now either, really. But, I feel like it's a little misplaced now. The oyster days are gone, it seems; the pearls harvested. Slogging along gets the job done.
I don't mean to sound negative and I don't mean for this to be a navel-gazing existential thing. But you know, if there's something big on the way, some kind of breakthrough or whatever, I'd kind of like it to just happen and get moving. My patience for this kind of thing isn't what it once was. Plus, time and I aren't on the friendliest of terms... it passes too quickly and I never seem to have enough of it.
So bring it on.
Though another thought occurs to me. This sensation could also be an early sign of some kind of mental breakdown. Very possible, and almost as disconcerting.