I'm going to go ahead and say this. It's been on my mind since Proposition 8 started hitting the news again, and while I already know my thoughts on the issue, I've wanted to allow them to stew into the proper language. Because sometimes, saying things the right way is most important.
In a nutshell: I think if two men want to love each other and get married, or if two women want to, then that's ok. And I think if the government is going to recognize a married hetero couple as a legal entity, it should grant that same recognition to a gay couple. To do otherwise is discriminatory.
Once upon a time, the only people with any rights in this country were white male landowners. As time passed, and with protests from the oppressed, we started to realize that wasn't proper. So, black people, women, and various minorities got — over time — the right to vote, the right to be treated the same, and otherwise become full citizens of this country.
As they should have been all along.
I believe there will be — again, over time — a similar realization concerning gay folks getting married... the realization that "we, the people" includes everybody. I don't know how long it will take, or how hard a fight it will be. But I believe it will take place within a generation.
Every once in awhile, flag-burning becomes a hot button issue. The debate invariably degrades into one side screaming: "If you're not against flag-burning, you must hate America!" And everyone gets all up into arms because the flag is involved, and since that's a symbol of America, burning it by extension means disrespect to the country. But that's really not it at all — the question boils down to the right to choose. I have the right to choose whether or not to burn a flag. It doesn't necessarily mean I'm going to do so. You certainly do not have the right to tell me I can't express myself in this manner.
And, every once in awhile, abortion becomes a hot button issue. Same kind of deal: "If you're not against abortion, you must want to kill babies!" And again, no. First of all, I don't even have the right to choose this, because I don't have the correct plumbing to pump out babies. But, I believe women should have the right to choose whether or not they should get an abortion. I certainly don't have the right to choose this on a woman's behalf, and in fact, I am not advocating for abortion or against it, and never will.
Do you see the pattern here? It's about the right to choose, and to make those choices freely and without someone else imposing their decisions, life viewpoints, or political motivations upon you. In that same vein, the government can't decide two dudes shouldn't get married, or two ladies, any more than it can decide people with different colored skin shouldn't. What right does it have in saying who can and can't love each other and have a committed relationship together and enjoy all the legal privileges thereto?
If it's going to maintain that level of influence over people's personal lives, then it's really not too far removed from separate drinking fountains and throwing women in jail for wanting to vote.